Grabe. Since last Thursday pa kong less 4 hours lang ang tulog. Alam kong ganon na kalala ang pagpupuyat ko at pagsespend ko ng almost 24 hours sa harap ng pc nang marealize ko na for the last few days I wake up e nagpapalpitate ako na para bang I’ve been working out. Darn. Tingin ko pag tinrack ko yung nag-ta-throb sa may bandang ilalim ng chin ko (the one closer sa neck, left side) more than 80 sya in a minute (I’ve watched this before na normal daw is 30 beats a minute, the moment you wake up. Safe is 60, there is a problem if it had gone to 80). I fear for my life. Naalala ko yung kwento ng ka-office mate ko na may friend (ata) yung friend nya who suddenly died on his sleep. He was a health buff yet he died. In autopsy they found his heart wrapped in fat. Well syempre hindi sila related na situation pero nakakatakot pa rin. Baka kasi sa sobrang sleep deprived ko e bigla na lang ako magshut down. Eee kakatakot.
Anyways, before I went to sleep, I actually asked na sana magising pa ko se last na yun sa consecutive nights kong pagpupuyat. I do say thanks for giving me breath for the entire day everytime I pray kaso this time talagang inespecify ko na na sana magising pa talaga ako. Nakakahiya naman, mamaya maging headline pa ko at maging dahilan bakit hindi na magkaron ng ISAC (Information and System Analysis Course) ever.
Pero nagising ako (Yey God!). Hindi ko matandaan kung tinanggal ko ba yung alarm ko pero naalimpungatan lang ako an hour later than the time I was supposed to wake up (4am). I thought, ok, wag ka nang magbasa ng hair. Medyo groggy ka pa to even try, I said. Or probably tinamad lang ako (hehe). For the last time that morning, I’ve done a single printable report just for the sake of having it, prepared for my day and went out after checking multiple times if I’ve brought my documents, my data cd and my memory card. Bumabalik na naman ang pagiging OC ko. Well technically hindi. Pero yung kapatid ko testifies so. Wala naman sigurong medyo OC. Kaya siguro hindi nga. But what else would you call checking multiple times kahit alam kong di ko naman ginalaw? Hmm. Siguro OA. (Nyahaha)
I rode a Cubao bus na nahabol ko na naman at wala syang laman infairness. I tried to sleep for a bit pero hindi ko nagawa kasi my head is still whirring for all the things I have to remember and I notice na si kunduktor kept coming back and checking on me for the lamest reasons. My officemates said me ‘nasa’ daw sya sa kin. I told myself, was it my blouse? Why? Why in heaven’s name do I have to pull up a good outfit and have men look at me like that?! Bakeeeeeeeeeeeeet?! Bakit kapag may nakikita naman akong may ganon wala lang? Can’t a girl just dress up for a single day ng walang makukuhang reaksyon?! Minsan ko lang gawin yun utang na loob. Grr. Am I abnormal?!
Pagkababa ko sa Ortigas, I photocopied copies of the ones I printed yesterday, akalain mo 2 pesos ang isa?! Buti na lang iniklian ko ng sobra ang docu ko. Umabot sya ng 6. Normally if I’ve done the docu as formal as I wanted to do it, woah. Baka umikot ang ulo ko dahil 3 copies ang kailangan kong maproduce para sa panel. Hay buti na lang 6 pages lang ang proposal ko na tinanggal ko na ang spacing, pinaliit na fonts, tinanggal ang table of contents at di ko na sinama yung ibang printables. When I was done, dumaan ako sa Mini Stop para tumingin ng formal looking (haha, reminds me of Calvin on one strip where he expect na magiging mataas ang grade nya sa badly done report dahil sa kanyang malupit na--) clear folder kaso wala. Before I went out I’ve seen those Hot Loops donuts and my mouth began to water. Iwas iwas! I just ate donuts yesterday from Country Style. And this puyat thing is not good for my eating habits either. I was totally eating too much these past few days.
Nagaantay akong pwedeng makatawid ng biglang dumating si Jess, then si Ica, right on cue para makasakay kami ng jeep. There, pagdating, wala na naman ang may hawak ng susi and the rest of us waited. Dumating na si Mon, then si Win then the bosses, then Charlene na isa sa may copy ng susi. Haay finally.
Nagbunutan na, nabunot ko non C3, C for the third assigned room, which is yung Training Room, and 3, ika-3 sa magpepresent sa room na yun. I’ve accepted my fate to be next to Win who was more nervous of his unfinished system but was taken aback nang sinabing magsastart na, at yung naunang dalawa sa akin ay hindi pa nakakapagprint ng docu (kasi sobrang bagal ng printer ng office dito), sinabihan akong ako muna. Wow. I’ve only read my docu once today. Kamusta naman yun.
And so it happened, I was the first on that room, panels ko si Ms. J saka si Ms. Juday (I call it the convention of the J’s kasi my nickname is Joy). I haven’t brushed up on my English and I felt stupid verbally, I wasn’t really comfortable presenting in English especially if I am that type of presenter who reads and studies the document then do the presentation impromptu. Back when I was studying I always prepare too much, too many scratch papers and index cards on the table which I rarely look at when I present. And it does work I tell you. It never failed me. I always get good feedback and less questions unanswered.
This time it didn’t din naman. I remembered nagulat na naman ako the second time this day when Ms. J popped the question na ‘What would you feel when you are to be offered an SA position?’ Damn. Nagrun sa utak ko na naghahanap nga pala sila Mam Telly ng SA dahil kulang na ang CPI non. Syet. Wag po sana. Mabilis pa sa alas kwatrong sinabi kong ayaw ko with matching ‘hehe’. Ayaw ko non. Tinanong nila ako bakit sinabi kong ayaw ko. Alam ko nangyayari sa boss ko no. Ano ako bale? Users are the worst type of customers ever. Unlike customers kasi pag sinabi mo sa kanilang ‘ayaw’ or ‘di pwede’ tinatanggap nila agad. Users aren’t any close to that. They are ruthless, lazy and for most of the time introduces incredulous in giving ‘what to dos’. Argh. I hate facing Users. Kaso kamusta naman na tinanong ako kung may problem ba ako sa paggawa ng docu sabi ko hindi, pinipigil kong sabihing ‘medyo’ type ko talaga ang pagdodocu (it was the first job that I’ve applied for kaso hindi ako natanggap for reasons na I’m a fresh grad. This said company offered me a Java position kaso bukod sa hindi ako nainom ng kape, Java is the least of the languages I am willing to learn as of...), parang tingin ko kasi laro lang sya for some reason at sabi ko ok na lang kaso silang dalawa nagtatag team pa talaga sa mga comments na parang tinutulak nila akong ipursue yun.
Alam kong ploy lang yun (conspiracy I tell you!) for some big picture pero di ako padadaig, no no talaga. Siguradong I’d face two things on my enemy list: Users and Skirts. Yeap. The probability of meeting the two of them are so high I’d rather not. Medyo umaandar na naman ng mabilis ang utak ko sa sobrang pagaalarm nya pero I believe my ears caught, ‘you have the makings of an SA’ saka ‘kailangan mo lang exposure’. Nako talian nyo pa ko, offeran nyo pa ko, isang malaking AYAW. It’s like either accept being an SA or drink coffee, I’d rather do the latter. Kumbaga choose the lesser evil kahit alam kong sobrang vile sa kin ang smell of coffee alone.
So I was done, almost the same time as Ica did, and was so happy na natapos na rin ATLAST. Antay, chika sa mga natira and went out to lunch with Danny and Mon sa KFC. On the way may mga nakapark na dalawang Porsche (din ata yung isa) na silver at red. Danny joked while touching a bit of the two and I commented that I didn’t understood what’s with them boys. I said I understood the fact that IT is Porsche but the excitement and the covet feeling wasn’t there eh. Nirarason ni Mon na kasi top of the line kasi and seeing one for real kaya ganon. But I still don’t get it. For the second time I said again, ‘Am I abnormal?!’
We then went back, heard na tapos na si Win and was happy din na tinuloy nya pa rin even if napanghihinaan na sya ng loob earlier. Sobrang swerte ko nga sa turn out ng events dahil nung sya na (di ba nga dapat ako yung ikatlo kaso namove ako), he faced 4 panels na, two of which are the bosses. Nadaan na naman ata ako sa divine intervention.
After everything else, umuwi na kami at ako, kahit anong habol ko, e hindi ko naabot yung unang bus na nakita kong parating. Isa uling damn. Naisip kong I just run out of luck na. Then I realized what the heck. The fact I came out of the presentation alive is more than enough no. Plus maaga pa. There ought to be more buses at this time of the day. Siguro 5 minutes later ayan, nakasakay na ko at whoala. Sobrang traffic ata di ko lang napansin. Nakatulog ako saglit eh. Narealize ko lang sobrang sakit na ng bottom ko kauupo. After a few stops and all, nakauwi na rin atlast. Yun nga lang, ang balak kong matulog for the rest of the day hindi naman natuloy. Ayaw ako payagan ng katawan ko. And yes, after a million stallings after I decided na lang to write this yet another lengthy blog. And it was so worth it. Back to my real life as an SA’s Developer (Programmer for laymen) and I couldn’t be more contented. Come to think of it meron pala. Increase. Hehe. Tagal kasi. Sana magkaron na ko. Tagal ko nang inaantay eh. This cutoff ko malalaman. Kung meron, well, malalaman nyo na lang pag naisingit ko sa financial obligations ko ang pagbili ng Tales of Beedle The Bard. Hahahaha.